Feelings are complicated. Relationships are mystifying. It’s frustrating when you don’t even know what you want. For the longest time, I was happy on my own, with no desire to date or sleep with anyone. In fact, I didn’t want to feel bound to anyone. And I didn’t feel comfortable with romantic labels, either, especially […]Read More An aromantic’s quest to find a stable, loving relationship
Thank you, Sophie @ Sophie’s Corner for nominating me for this award. Do check out her blog when you can! She writes many reflective and interesting book reviews, as well as other fun and engaging posts on reading, writing, and life in general. The Rules: Thank the blogger who nominated you, provide a link to […]Read More The Liebster Award
Anders Ericsson, a psychology researcher, studied many internationally acclaimed musicians, chess players, athletes, and experts in other domains; he postulates that innate talent doesn’t exist, and that we need at least 10,000 hours of deliberate practice to become a world-class expert in a field. This is called the 10,000-hour rule, a.k.a. the 10-year rule, assuming […]Read More Thoughts on Deliberate Practice and Outstanding Achievement
In this part of the Fear of Emotional Closeness series, I will address the fears of being influenced by someone, being disappointed by or disappointing them, and being exposed and vulnerable to this someone. Being Influenced You might be afraid of growing emotionally close to somebody, because you worry that they will influence […]Read More Fear of Emotional Closeness Part Two: Being Influenced, Being Disappointed, and Being Exposed and Vulnerable
You may have heard of the much praised and desirable ideal, a “satisfying relationship,” or a “great relationship.” But what does this mean exactly? Here are some of my thoughts. Firstly, there should be happiness in the relationship, where there are many more positive moments than negative ones. The friends should show mutual respect and […]Read More Satisfying Friendships, Emotional or Intellectual Connection, and Emotional Closeness
My friendships have become more satisfying over the years. In my childhood and teens, my friendships were rather surface level, where we just had fun, hung out, and kept each other company to stave off our loneliness. But in my adulthood, my friendships became happier, more profound, and more fulfilling. We have deeper conversations, and […]Read More What is a “Deep and Meaningful” Conversation in Friendships?
Friends have asked me why I don’t want to be famous. Leila (all names are pseudonyms here) thought it would be awesome if I could be a bestselling writer like J.K. Rowling. Leila didn’t understand that stardom wasn’t what I was aiming for. Another friend, Fanny, believed that everyone wanted to be famous, so she […]Read More For and Against Fame